24th January 2014 9:00
By Blue Tutors
The latest piece of mad news from schools is that head teachers are having to warn the parents of the students not to behave badly at school sports days. We have learned that some parents are interfering with games, yelling at opponents, and in some cases, screaming at their own children that they need to perform better. That it has got to the point that some schools have actually produced a guide for parents on how they are expected to behave at school events underlines the seriousness of the issue. However, if this is how parents are behaving in public, how are they behaving at home where there are no teachers to issue guidelines on how competitive they are allowed to be?
This is a concern of many private tutors who do get to see how parents approach their children’s education at home. The competitiveness outlined by head teachers is my no means restricted to sports, although perhaps in that arena it is more easily observed. Traditionally, it is acceptable to express competitive views, and even shout and scream aggressively at sports events, whereas this would not be expected before or after a school exam. Except for some children, that is exactly what they get. Many tutors have been brought in after have underperformed in a school test, by angry parents who have told them they jolly well need to do better or else! Beginning lessons with an under-confident , upset student who is frightened of letting their parents down again is no way to begin a productive teaching relationship.
Teaching students who are struggling that there is nothing ‘wrong’ with them is one of the most difficult tasks a tutor faces. It is made more difficult when parents behave as though they are failing, and a disappointment. A private tutor can help any student of all abilities, and working with a tutor should be seen as a way of enriching education rather than as a sign of failure. The trick is for the tutor to build the confidence of their student, and convince them of their value, especially in cases where parents are undermining these efforts.